There is no spoon. There are no pink unicorns. There is no self. There are no gods. Get over it.

There are, however, quite a few teapots in orbit around the Sun... and billions of people as well. I am one of them. That is, I am a person in orbit around the sun. I am not a teapot. However, being a teapot is observer relative. I suppose that someone might decide to consider me a teapot. That would be a strange person.